Discovering Oneself Essay Writing

Ekaterina rejects her Communist childhood, full of pressure to conform, and creates the life she always wanted. But first, she had to leave home to find it.

What can be a more amazing travel journey than life itself? Think about this question. It is important.

Each of us is born on this planet for a certain purpose. We all have a certain mission to realize in life.

The most important thing is to know: this is what you are supposed to do.

It can be anything: creating a family, becoming a banker or spending one’s whole life on the road. The most important thing is to know: this is what you are supposed to do.

Quite often, unfortunately, many of us do not have this feeling – the feeling of wholeness, the feeling of belonging, the feeling of happiness. Instead we perform, or procrastinate or try to conform to certain rules imposed on us by society, without stopping for a second and asking ourselves: am I content? Am I doing what I really want to do?

Realizing our full potential and finding our true self is the true travel journey of life.

Not long ago, when I was yet again changing countries of residence, a friend of mine told me a very important thing:

“Ekaterina,” he said, “I know why you are moving, but never forget that whatever your destination, you always take yourself with you. Finding yourself is your true destination.”

The Road Ahead

For more than ten years my life has been that of a traveler. Even though for the majority of these ten years I had an apartment and a steady job, I was still traveling. I was traveling in my mind, I was changing countries and I was always looking for a better place, a better world.

Being born in the Soviet Union, in my first years of life I had quite a simple image of what life should be: first you become a pioneer (the first grade on the scale of communism), then a ‘comsomol’ (the second grade on the scale of communism) and finally, if you are the best, you become a communist.

My gradation stopped at the first scale, along with that simple vision of reality as soon as the political regime changed.

However, what didn’t change was the belief that in order to succeed in society one has to perform, one has to ‘graduate’. The goal was no longer a final communist grade; it became something else, but it all came down to the same gradation system the majority of us are taught to achieve – almost from the day we are born.

You have to do this, you have to become that, you have to be better and work harder than others, and you have to be like everyone else. Because of these rules, slowly but surely we tend to take a road opposite to our true destination.

A Reflection

At some point in my life I achieved my ‘communist’ grade. I was leading a life many people would find ideal.

With a title of financial analyst and portfolio manager, living in the center of Amsterdam, speaking four languages and in possession of a membership in the most prestigious sport club of the city, I had everything one can wish for in life. But in reality I had nothing at all.

I was losing myself, I was simply performing, thinking that life is about having a prestigious job, a cool apartment and a nice salary. And only my terrible stomach pains and the crying during the night were clear indicators that the ‘ideal’ life I led was actually quite miserable.

I was losing myself, I was simply performing, thinking that life is about having a prestigious job, a cool apartment and a nice salary.

One day I decided to create my own gradation system, or to be more precise, the absence of any gradation system. I stopped performing.

First, I canceled my membership to the sport club. Second, I changed jobs, agreeing to a lower salary and a less prestigious title simply to allow myself to find my own journey. Third, I started to write.

Being in love with books all my life I always wanted to share stories, and regardless of whether I am an unpublished or published writer, writing for myself is something that gives me the best satisfaction of all.

Finally, I started to follow the signs – the signs of life, trying to see who am I, what I am doing in this life and why?

I asked myself: what do I really like to do?

Journey of Wonder

The discovery of signs led me to an important realization: Life is a journey of wonder.

If I stayed in my gradation niche I would probably never have discovered bio-dance as a perfect alternative to the gym, gentle respiration techniques to make me calm and Tarot reading as a perfect activity for spending time when I am on my own.

All this resulted in the fact that, yet again, I changed my country of residence. I moved from Amsterdam to Brussels, the city where I had gone to university and where I couldn’t stay after my studies due to my Russian citizenship at that time.

I came back to this city without a grade, with a Dutch passport and as a new person. I realized one of the most important lessons in life: whatever your nationality, profession, salary or the net amount your house costs, the only real thing in life is you.

All stories have the same line. A hero leaves his village for the discovery of the world.

His first obstacle comes when he is on the road: he has to choose his destination. His second obstacle is during the journey. He has to fight the enemies. And finally, he has the most important choice: does he continue the journey or go back to the village?

We are all heroes on the road. And the most important journey for all of us is to meet our true selves. Apart from external enemies, quite often the biggest villain lies within, and this villain in the majority of cases is our own ego. Finding our soul and realizing our true potential is where our village lies.

As Paolo Coelho once said: “Never give up on your dreams, – follow the signs.”

Ekaterina Petrovna’s current goal in life is to become a Porcupine. In the animal spirit world this animal represents rediscovery of wonder and trust in the Great spirit. She has a degree in interpreting and speaks 4 languages. In her spare time Ekaterina writes, reads Tarot cards, dances like crazy, laughs, and tries to make this world a better place to live.

You may think you have a pretty good grip on what type of person you are. Let's face it, you just spent the last four years of your life jockeying for social status and acceptance in teenage hormone land, otherwise known as high school. Everything from where you sat at lunch to which classes you took was something that defined you and dictated what your day to day life was like.

Maybe you really like skating? Maybe you really like math? Maybe you really like painting? All noble activities, but allow me to tell you something exciting and maybe a little concerning. As well as you think you know yourself and what you enjoy doing, the college application process will mess with your preconceptions and alter the way you look back at the things you've done.

When I started filling out my MIT application I had a pretty solid game plan: Stress band, life in the country, and sense of humor and then sprinkle a love of building things and strong work ethic on top. Simple enough, I figured it summed me up pretty well.

I started filling out the MIT application the day it became available (I actually think I got Part I in about four hours after it was posted online) so that I'd have plenty of time to just roll the essay topics around in my head and wait for inspiration. That's the thing about writing for me, I can't force myself to write something within a given prompt, I have to just wait until I randomly come up with the perfect plan or idea and then I run with it. That's why although I filled out almost every part of my application starting on August 1st I didn't start filling out my main essay until around October 1st. It scared my parents that I hadn't even thought about the essay, let alone started writing it, with only a month left. I, however, wasn't worried, because until October 1st I hadn't had the perfect idea, something to write about that actually said who I was.

You will probably run into this while applying to colleges, especially if you're doing it right. If you're cranking out applications like an assembly line worker you may not have time to just wait for the perfect essay so you'll have to rely on writing skills alone. I suggest you pick the school you most want to attend and just mull over the essay topics. Don't necessarily think about them, but just remember them and see what happens during day-to-day life that would help make that essay the best it can be.

This post is called "discovering yourself" because as much as you think you know about yourself, by the end of the college application process you will know so much more. It makes you think about what truly matters in your life, what aspects do you feel are more important than others, what do you value? Is band more important than Model UN? You only have room for a couple of activities, some may have to be dropped, which will they be? On MIT's application you'll have to remember what you've done over the last several summers and pick the things that you feel helped shape you. You'll also have to find something that you do just for fun, which was actually one of the harder things to write in my application. I do so many things for fun, which one was the one I find most important? Have you ever just sat down and thought about the one thing you do for fun that you'd put above all of the others?

When you're done filling out an application, if you've done it correctly, you'll have a boiled down version of you. In theory you've dug deep and figured out what matters in your life, transferred it to paper, and can only hope that admissions will like what they see. Writing what you hope admissions wants to see is a dangerous dangerous game to play. You need to be a good fit for MIT and if an application gets you accepted but doesn't reflect who you are, you may be absolutely miserable here and will have nobody to blame but yourself. You'll want to yell and scream at MIT and everybody around you, but you'll actually know that it was because you lied about who you were and you get to enjoy the consequences.

I hope applying to college is as meaningful for you as it was for me. A big part of the reason I'm an admissions blogger now is because of the college application process and how much I gained from it. I wouldn't be nearly as willing to help people and answer questions if I had been dishonest or "studied to the test" because then I wouldn't know if I actually belonged here. I do belong here, because that application was me, and I know that when MIT accepted that application they were going to get the student they read about.

Enjoy the process and learn a lot, you won't regret it in the slightest. As a little present I've built a handy-dandy spreadsheet for you to keep track of all those teacher recommendations and things. It's not perfect (maybe kind of ugly?) but it's totally functional and you're welcome to tweak it to your own specifications. Boxes can be either red or green with a date. Red indicates that the action has not taken place yet, green with a date lets you know when it has. This template is set up with the colleges I was going to apply to but feel free to change the names/colors of the columns to match your college preferences.

There's another tab at the bottom of the spreadsheet called "Mailing Labels." This is a good place to put the addresses to the schools so that you know where to mail all of this stuff. Go ahead and add more tabs, colors, labels, or anything else you want. Spreadsheets are wonderful ways of organizing a ton of information and keeping everything in order. Good luck!

Click here for the awesome college organizational spreadsheet!

Oh, and here's a dancing lemur for Sam (see 10th comment)


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